My university has a forum called 'The Student Bar' which is basically quite a lot like facebook, only The Student Bar was there in the days before facebook. Anyway, I started a thread on there when I was in my second year called 'Advice To Freshers' which proved to be a hit and I got a LOT of positive feedback from it. I was rooting through my Bureau having a sort-out when I found a load of notes I made for it in an old exercise book, so I thought I'd write it down here so that anyone else, regardless of which uni you're planning on going to - all around the world, if you're about to start university, or 'College' as Americans seem to call it, you're all going to find yourself in pretty much the same situation. So this blog/article/whatever will give you the benefit of my first hand experience of what to expect.
1. LEAVING HOME
Leaving home to live on your own can be a daunting prospect at the best of times, but moving to another part of the country/world to a new place full of strangers and pretty much being left to your own devices can be pretty scary. Depending on whether or not you get on well with your family, it can also be an extremely emotional time.
You may think it's hit you when you've got a car full of boxes containing your whole life for the next 3-4 years, and your mum is blubbing on your shoulder about how she can't understand how you've grown up so fast but you'll always be her baby.. but you would be wrong. The time when reality really hits you right in the gut is when you're in your bare room, surrounded by all your stuff in boxes and the door closes behind your parents, and you're left sitting on your bed, alone, thinking 'now what'?
Many of us experience homesickness - even those of us who don't seem to. It's nothing to be ashamed of or to be embarassed by - a lot of those who you see partying the hardest are often the ones missing home the most. I know a lot of my friends spent the first two weeks in tears because they missed everyone at home so much, even if 'home' was a half-hour drive away (!)
Part of the shock is also to do with your clinical looking new room - but once you've got all your stuff unpacked (which you should do as soon as possible) and put your own duvet cover on, scattered your cushions, pictures and general junk around (and if you're a messy person, make a bit of a mess) and you'll feel right at home in no time!
Taking photos of your loved ones and sticking them up around your room really helps - as do frequent phonecalls home. The best thing you can do to avoid the homesick blues and enjoy yourself is to get out there, and get involved in university life - after all, a majority of you are there for three years - make the most of it while you can! I know you're probably fed up with hearing people banging on about university being the best years of your life - I mean, they lied about school didn't they!, but really, uni really is the best time you'll ever have in your life. I've been graduated for just under a year now, and not a day goes by without me wishing I was still a student!
Another small point to note, is that almost EVERYONE I know, and have spoken to on this matter has come to the same conclusion: the people you meet and befriend in your first few weeks of uni, you'll be friends with for the rest of your time there, and undoubtedly, will be friends with for the rest of your life. Out of my circle of 5 best friends at uni, 1 of them I met in the office of the course convenor before I even officially joined, and 3 of the others I met in my first two weeks.
Don't be afraid to talk to people - they're all in the same boat as you. It might be a little frustrating initially on the first day where EVERYONE asks you the same 5 questions:
1. What's your name?
2. Where are you from?
3. What course are you doing?
4. What halls/college are you staying in. (If you're living off-campus, this complicates things because they then want to know where that is, and is it near to town, how long is the walk into uni, what's it like in the outside world in that area, are you living with parents still etc etc etc)
5. Want to go check out the bar later?
After 3 hours of this, I felt like making a cardboard sign and hanging it around my neck to save time!
2. THREE SIMPLE RULES OF UNIVERSITY SEX
1. Just because you have had sex with somebody, it doesn't automatically mean you are boyfriend and girlfriend, unless, of course, you were already going out to begin with. Welcome to the world of the one night stand. Not amazingly pleasant if you're not a one-night-stand kinda person, but a reality you should be aware of.
2. ALWAYS use protection! condoms are often given out free from univeristy medical centres - there are Sexually Transmitted Diseases all over the place, so don't take any unneccesary chances! You might be the most loyal monogomous person in the world, but it doesn't matter because the person you sleep with might change their sexual partners more often than they change their socks. If you're in doubt, go to a sexual health clinic and get yourself checked out. Yes, it'd be embarassing, but you'd rather be safe than sorry, right?
3. If you're having sex in your room in halls (I think Americans call them dorm rooms) EVERYONE will hear it unless you have a bed that doesn't squeak or knock against anything, and you are really quiet. If not, the chances are you will be teased in the morning. Pretty much everyone in your block will know about it. For all the good they do, the walls may as well not be there. Also, show some consideration for those trying to sleep in the rooms on either side, above and below you. If you're having a great time, well, good for you, but the other people trying to get to sleep or trying to study really don't need to hear it. Show some consideration.
3. LIVING OFF-CAMPUS: WHAT TO EXPECT
I was in a draughty old cottage for my first year with four other people, and poor insulation throughout, and absolutely no insulation in the kitchen, which made mealtimes rather interesting in the depths of winter. UCAS made a mistake on my grades and sent my first choice university the wrong information so they rejected me, even though I HAD got the right grades, so I had to go through clearing and because this was so last minute, all the halls had filled up so I had to find my own place independently and share with a bunch of people I'd never met. Not an ideal situation - I ended up hating 3 of them and being best friends with one!
Anyway - the three detestables were the most wasteful people I knew, having the heating up to 30'C with all the windows wide open, leaving lights on throughout the house all night when they came in drunk etc etc.
Our average bills (bearing in mind, this was 2005-2006 so inflation and recession have raped these prices) excluding water came to (each)
£35 quarterly - gas (british gas)
£8 monthly (excluding calls) - BT Broadband @ £30 a month+ phone £10.50 a month
£30 quarterly - electicity (southern electric?)
like I said, these are in no way accurate representations of todays prices - this was the world before BT put the prices up on everything
BINS: if you have your wheelie bin stolen (usually by drunk students thinking it'd be funny to ride in) it will cost YOU £50 to replace it. They aren't freebees from the council, and your landlond won't pay as it is you responsibility to keep the property intact and in order.
If you're living in a place like Canterbury, where the council are anal about which rubbish they collect and when, it can pile up very quickly. Canterbury takes in rubbish on alternate weeks - so one week is recyclables, the next week is household waste (which absolutely SUCKS if you live in a flat so your entire kitchen ends up being one giant bin. If you refuse to buy a wheelie bin and put your crap in black bin bags, they won't be collected, and you'll get a snarky note from the environmental services people put on them saying that they won't be collected because they don't 'do' black bags, and if they find them on the street again, they'll give you a £50 fine for littering. Which is absolutely ludicrous, in my opinion, but I don't make the rules. The alternative is to buy purple bags, which are £13 for 30. In all honesty, the £50 chunk of cash may bring a lump to your throat, but it's a far less bitter pill to swallow in the long run than £13 for 30 bags which would last you maybe 2-3 months depending on how much waste you produce.
TV LICENCE
When you get a TV licence, regardless of whether or not your landlord paid for it, always make sure you have a copy of it in a safe place in the house where it won't get lost. In my first year, the landlord supposedly paid for it (he said he did a lot of things... a note to the wise: student landlords will try to fuck you over in any way they can, so be on your guard - get EVERYTHING in writing, so you can throw it in their face when they turn round and try to screw you out of money you don't owe)
and we had several warning letters and a visit from the TV licence company who wanted to fine us £1000 for not having a TV licence. We actually had two licences for the house, but as our landlord had the documents, we couldn't prove it, and spent 3 weeks trying to sort it out and battling with them because they wanted to send the bailiffs around.
4. HOUSEHOLD PRODUCTS: A CHECKLIST
The best way we found of organising the household shopping was to have a kitty: we each stuck a tenner in at the beginning of the term and had one person designated to do the 'kitty shopping'. When all the money was gone, we all stuck another tenner in. This prevented arguments over whose turn it is to buy toilet paper, and stopped one person ending up paying more than everyone else.
What you will need:
Washing up liquid
Sponges (the fat yellow ones may cost a bit more, but they last much longer than the cheaper thinner ones)
Jay Cloths (those gingham fabric things for mopping up spills)
dusters (for the tv mainly)
kitchen roll, and lots of it. Never underestimate how many things can be spilt when drunk
toilet roll, and even more of it - often ends up being a substitute for kitchen roll when someone's forgotten to buy it
bathroom cleaner.
dettol surface spray for the kitchen
BLEACH! trust me, you do NOT want mushrooms growing in your shower like we had, because the tiles weren't sealed properly and mushrooms started sprouting out of the rotting grouting.
binbags for indoor bins
black bags for general rubbish. recycling bags tend to be delivered free by the council
hoover bags - sounds obvious, but make sure you get the right one
a bucket - ALWAYS useful - from swabbing the decks to a pot for making mashed potato when you have 12 people around for sausage and mash
air freshner. A MUST for the loo!!!!!
5. LANDLORDS
As aforementioned, my landlord for my first year was an exceptionally bad one, and my landlord in my third year could rival Joe Walker (dad's army) in terms of conning people. So, some practical advice:
1. Very rarely will you find a genuinely good landlord. They are there to get as much money out of you as possible, not letting you stay there out of the kindness of their hearts, so if they can find a way out of doing work on the house, they will. If they don't do something that needs doing - like fixing a ceiling that's fallen in (which has actually happened to one of my friends - it fell on her laptop - so make sure you get all your gear insured!!!, or your fridge has exploded (which happened to me in my 3rd year) call them, pester them, and if you have to, threaten them with legal action until they get off their arses and do something about it. If they try and swindle you out of money by saying 'you need to pay for this' challenge them, if you feel that you shouldn't pay (read your contact carefully) and anything they try and charge you for - demand to see the receipts.
2. Get everything in writing. Ask for things in writing, and when you want something done, write to them and make sure everything is dated and/or sent via registered post if it is something important. That way, if they try to deny saying they'd do something later on, you will have the proof that they did agree.
3. If you are being messed around by your landlord, DON'T think that you are helpless. Go to the university students union and the campus accommodations offices and they'll be able to give you advice and support. If your landlord really is an absolute nightmare, get them blacklisted so nobody else has to put up with them.
4. upon moving in, go around with a camera and take photos of everything in the room. print out, write the date on the back, store somewhere safe. Upon moving out, go around with a camera, and take photos of everything - and again print out and write the date on the back. that way if they try to get you to pay damage costs on something that was already broken when you moved in you can tell them where they can stick their damage costs.
5. Landlords will do anything in their power to withhold your deposits at the end of the year. They will find ANY excuse to not give you your money back. My 3rd year landlord said to us he'd take our bins out for us when we all went on holiday for a week. At the end of the year, he tried to charge us £40 per bag. He'd never said ANYTHING about that before. So basically - keep your eyes open - they are all conmen hellbent of screwing you out of every penny you don't have.
6. ALARMS
a quick note for people living in dorms/halls: Have a set of clothes put aside including gloves, and know exactly where they are, because when fire alarms go off at and you're standing outside for 2 hours at 4AM because some pillock forgot they were cooking fajitas, it gets COLD!
here ends my advice (my notes ran out and i can't think of anything else to add to that right now) hope it's been of some help
xx
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